Lost and found

For quite some time now, I have been inspired by a beautiful poem written by David Wagoner called “Lost”. This past week I discovered that Wagoner based his poem on a traditional teaching given by Indigenous elders in the Pacific Northwest (U.S.A.). The story goes that a child asks an elder what to do if they become lost within the density of the forest. The elder’s advice is to “stand still”.  Or, in Wagoner’s poetic language,

Stand still. The trees ahead and bushes beside you
Are not lost. Wherever you are is called Here,
And you must treat it as a powerful stranger,
Must ask permission to know it and be known.

Lately, these words have been echoing in my heart. Perhaps the poem speaks to my North American origins. Although it seems to me, and I do not know if it is because of my age (and the age of my friends), that now is the time to decide how we want to live our life and to start making decisions around that vision. This means becoming intimately engaged with what Wagoner calls ‘Here’ so that we can know what that vision might look like.

For me, this is a departure from the fast-paced, child rearing/ career driven, resource gathering stage of my 30s and 40s. This was a time of perpetually leaning into the future and a time of “doing” so that I could be free to “be” when I am older. Don’t get me wrong, we need to plan and we need to have goals. However, I somehow got lost in drive mode. I became partially disconnected from truly savouring the people and ways of ‘being’ that sustain me. I became lost.

I don’t think I understood how lost I became until recently. Due to my ever-evolving life, I have been almost forced to slow down. And in the slowing down, I have chosen to stand still, look around and become reacquainted with all that is ‘Here’ and all that is precious to me. I have been reminded of how I would like my life to feel and to move towards making it so.

The poem concludes with the lines,

Stand still. The forest knows
Where you are. You must let it find you.

In my slowing down and standing still, my vision became clear, and very quietly and without fanfare, I was found. So much so that I have been living with a renewed intentionality. I might even call it fierce. I know how I want to live my life. I know who I want to surround myself with. Every decision that I make going forward must come from this place of ‘Here’. I am sure that I will become lost again, but for now I am ‘Here’.

Now don’t get me wrong, it’s not that I think that this advice doesn’t apply to everybody, no matter what your age is. In fact, when my twenty four year old son rang me looking for counsel on living with uncertainty, my advice was to stand still. Look around, figure out how you want to live your life and what’s important to you and base all decisions from that space. When we are always living for what’s to come, we have the potential to miss out on what’s ‘Here’.

So my question for you is, how do you want to live your life? Are you lucky enough to be living it with presence and in line with what brings you sustenance and meaning? Are there any tweaks you might make? Perhaps, like many of us, there is uncertainty or indecision. If so, can you stand still and ask permission to know and be known by the myriad of blessings available to you- one of which might be the clarity that comes with slowing down.

If any of this speaks to you, I will be guiding a meditation on slowing down and opening up to ‘Here’ at the Sanctuary’s Tuesday morning online session. Why not join me?

-Jane

Click here to join me at the Sanctuary’s online meditation session on Tuesday morning at 10am

Lost

David Wagoner

Stand still. The trees ahead and the bushes beside you

Are not lost. Wherever you are is called Here,

And you must treat it as a powerful stranger,

Must ask permission to know it and be known.

The forest breathes. Listen. It answers,

I have made this place around you.

If you leave it, you may come back again, saying Here.

No two trees are the same to Raven.

No two branches are the same to Wren.

If what a tree or bush does is lost on you,

You are surely lost. Stand still. The forest knows

Where you are. You must let it find you.

Click below to listen to and download a meditation on slowing down and opening up to ‘Here’: